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I fell down again at Sanguine Gryphon today. It turns out that the pretty, pretty yarn that I missed out on the first time is back in stock. So, I went and bought that, plus a lot a few more colors that I just couldn’t live without.

When I saw the total, I thought, “I really should cut back…I don’t need all of these…I mean, they’re pretty and all, but I really shouldn’t…”

This is a problem I have. I’m willing to spend money to get good quality necessities like food, shelter, coffee (shut up–coffee is so a necessity) and so on. I’m even willing to spend money to get good quality tools for my hobby–needles and that. But yarn? As soon as I see the price tag, I feel guilty, even though the yarn is the part of my hobby that I really enjoy. (Well, and the needles. And the cute little stitch markers. And the experience of knitting. But the yarn is probably still the best part.) Why do I feel that I need to skimp? This is hours and hours of work, plus hours and days and years (I hope) of wear. The money I spend on yarn is not taking the clothes off our backs or the food (and coffee) out of our mouths. My husband fully supports my yarn buying habits. So, whence the guilt?

I really don’t know. Maybe I’m subconsciously against spoiling myself? Maybe, somewhere in the back of my mind, I don’t think I should be spending this much on a hobby? (I’m honestly surprised that there’s a part of my brain that hasn’t admitted that knitting isn’t a hobby–it’s an obsession a passion.)

I’ve decided that I need to work on this part of my brain that thinks I don’t deserve pretty yarn, even if it does come with a hefty price tag. I’m worth it, and so are my friends and family for whom I will be knitting (a few things). The yarn I’m buying is also worth every penny: it’s hand-dyed by really spiffy artisans, it supports American jobs, and it helps really lovely people continue doing what they want to do. Plus, it’s sooooooo nice to work with.

I didn’t take any out of the cart, except one of the skeins of blue yarn. I already have a lot of blue yarn. I have to draw the line somewhere.